Founder's

Blog

Meet Amara

"I hope to create a space where curlies and others can learn to love, nurture, take care of and take pride in their hair. "

When I think of hair and childhood, I immediately think of thighs. Yes, thighs. Sitting between thighs to have my braids taken out, having a thigh hit me in the face while my hair was washed, and again sitting between thighs while my hair was rebraided. Or as we say in Nigeria, “while they plait your hair”. It involved sitting still, at times in the comfort of my living room watching cartoons and other times in very noisy salons pretending to read a book while overhearing the local gossip.

It may come as no surprise that once my mother felt I was old enough to do my own hair, I was done sitting between thighs. I needed to come up with a hairstyle that was clean, simple and didn't take too much time. And so ushered in the decade-long period of my iconic slick back: a ponytail wrapped into a bun, slicked way back, and all the way down with copious amounts of hair gel. It seemed efficient as I hated having hair in my face and wasn’t sure how or where to learn about or explore new hairstyles. Like many other black girls and women, the slick back became my go-to.

The slick back was my signature look through my late teens and into my early twenties. On special occasions, like my father’s 50th birthday, my mother convinced me to get a blow out or box braids. “You know, something to look more feminine”, she would say. As the years progressed and I grew into myself, I discovered my true desire in wearing the slick back - I just wanted short hair.

As a black African woman of mixed race heritage it was no secret that everyone thought I had “good hair” - a ridiculous concept as all hair is good, how can hair be inherently bad? I was sensitive to this from a young age, I noticed hairdressers would gasp and then let out a sigh at the sight of my luscious, full, and thick head of hair - gasp for how beautiful it was, followed by a sigh for how long the appointment would take. Salon goers would politely chime in saying “ah ah now, won’t you share some of this hair with me! So much hair for this small girl eh ya”. The societal gaze was reinforced at home by my mother and aunties who praised my hair, made sure I knew how beautiful it was, and how lucky I was to have it. Needless to say, the thought of cutting my hair filled me with anxiety. And so, the slick back persisted. Through highschool, then college and into my first job - slicked back.

Another reason it took me so long to cut my hair was its association with my femininity. I have always been what you may call a “tomboy”, and coming out as a lesbian didn’t help. My long hair, that I would enjoy privately, felt to me like my one remaining link to femininity. No matter what I wore, if people saw the hair they would know I was a girl, and then woman. It was this utterly erroneous belief that kept my hair in that tight bun for a few more years. Until the day my sister did the unthinkable - on a whim, while at summer camp my sister chopped off all her hair. Manuela is eight years younger than I am and much more adventurous and courageous with all things beauty related. Seeing her with short hair ignited a fire in me. She looked gorgeous, was clearly still a woman but more than anything didn’t care for a second what anyone would say or think.

What was even more surprising is that my mother and all the aunties praised her and didn’t lament the loss of her luscious locks for a single second. She is the one who gave me the courage to make that appointment and cut my hair down to a cute skin-fade with curls-up-top combo. It’s been over two years since I cut my hair and I have lived a happier, more fulfilled and more confident life ever since. Years of the slick back had ruined my curls and this gave them a fresh start. Hair is deeply personal, it’s literally what you carry around on your head at all times. Many of us curlies face the same challenges living in a straight hair obsessed world. We pick, prod and contort our hair to do all sorts of things except what it’s meant to do - be flawlessly curled! In founding Radical Beauty Collective, I hope to create a space where curlies and others can learn about their hair. Learn to love it, nurture it, take care of it, and take pride in it.